The 1979 hit "We Are Family" by Sister Sledge is usually the favorite theme song for family reunions. Ironically, I didn’t hear it at my recent family gathering. It doesn’t mean the DJ didn’t play it. I mean, I wouldn’t know, since I did go to bed early on the night of the family dance. I admit it, I couldn’t hang, but it doesn’t mean I wasn’t humming the melody to myself all weekend.

And why not? The song’s lyrics may be simple but expressing family unity has universal appeal. Reunions allow us to laugh freely with the ones we love. In everyday life I may see one to two relatives outside my nuclear unit, but at a reunion, my family cup runneth over. And that overflow of kin folk has several very important benefits.

Just like a square dance, a reunion, encourages us to dance with new partners. I always wind up sharing a banquet table with someone outside my normal family circle. Standing in buffet lines and sitting on tour buses with aunts, uncles and cousins that I don’t normally see, has allowed me to strike up wonderfully memorable conversations with them – no matter how simple.

This time, I spent the better part of two days chatting with my cousins’ four year old son. He was as delightful as he was adorable. Rarely does my daily life allow me to enjoy the company of a preschooler but that is part of the beauty of reunions. You get to share precious moments with people other than the usual suspects.

And there is glue in those shared moments. As my family and I laughed at our resident comediennes (and our family seems to have more than our fair share) I could feel connections being strengthened or formed for the first time. At our reunions we always light candles and read the names of those relatives who have graduated to glory. A hush falls over the room as we choke back tears and join hands to grieve our collective loss. It is during those moments that all the politics, stress and expenses leading up to the reunion dissolve and we are just happy to be together.

A talent show usually occurs and routinely reveals more than talent. The poems, songs and dance numbers my relatives share wind up displaying just as much inner strength as they do artistic ability. For instance one of my preteen cousins chose to play the clarinet for her number. By the second line on her sheet music she was crying. Her clarinet had squeaked a couple of times and she was thoroughly frustrated. In our family children are loved, cherished and supported. It sounded like an old Baptist church in that banquet hall as several adults -including me- called out "take your time" and "you’ve got it". When her father (or uncle or cousin – I couldn’t read the name tag) got up and put his arm around her – she wiped her tears away and finished the number. I felt a sense of family pride well up inside of me as I realized that at no point did anyone consider quitting as an option.

The most senior members of my family are like a walking family history. Each line on their faces tells a story about our past. What we have been through and what we have overcome. We had five generations represented at this reunion. That rich family history is part of my inheritance.

The reality of family reunions is that they are often expensive and exhausting. They are also an excellent way to connect with the people you love while you still can. I will attend as many reunions as I can, since tomorrow is not promised. And I’ll be humming Sister Sledge all the wayl